you'll never see the courage I know...

never tell

never tell

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

12/09 - 3rd OAKLAND SHOW

Next morning up and going. I felt sorrow, like a 15 year old relationship had come to an end. Tori was more to me than just 'some woman up there on stage playing music' I think you all know what I'm talking about. So, I had decided that this was the last Tori tour I would do & that something had just died. It's not there anymore. I took a few pictures to document this moment & it was perfect 'cause Jim had a 'to venus & back' poster on the wall, sitting there lonely w/ nothing around it in the extra bedroom I was staying in. I'm glad I took these photos, but when I look @ them I get sad. I think Lisa left around noon to go visit her G'ma. So it was just me & Jim. On the way to the venue he turned me on to some new cd's/artists. I was really digging this music & the vibe it gave out. Thanks Jim honey, you can burn me that cd anytime you'd like. ;o). Me & Jim went to this vegetarian resturant & waited for Ursula, Joe, Lisa (bootleg lisa), Shelia and Carl to join us. We had fun talkin, taking pictures & I really was obsessed w/ their beautiful bathroom. Afterwards I ran into more friends. Then me & Joe snuck off to taco bell, (sorry Jim), I only picked @ my food @ the resturant. I ran into Drew & Kayla again. Fancy seeing you here. Haha. We were having fun until a roach tried crawling into Kayla's purse! Haha. We all took off & I didn't have a tix, I asked around. This time it was kinda taking longer. I asked this girl like twice & then after a while I turned around & there she was again. I was about to ask her again & I caught myself & said 'wait, I already asked you like 3 times haven't I?' She then came up to my face pretty close (haha) and said 'you wanna see a show?' So, I said 'yeah sure'. I think I asked her how much & she said 'nothing'. So we go in together. I already knew it was a balcony seat, but it was free, she was adorable & hell I had a plan. I tried sneaking in downstairs & the nazi's were like 'excuse me' & I kept walking & the bitch followed me. And the asshole from the night before. I told him to fuck off & get a life. And when he was holding the door open, I gave an ugly dreadful look at his hands to make him feel bad that he's getting old. I know I'm evil. I can be when pushed. So I go back upstairs, back to that girl. Her name is Rebecca by the way. So, I'm sitting there & I get a text from Lisa telling me to go downstairs & meet her at the door during 'Pro. Widow'. Fucking awesome. So I tell the poor girl goodbye again & actually tried & get her to come down w/ me. No go. So, I am so happy I went when I did. Down the stairs I go, just walking. Quiet lobby. No one around. Except for me... and let's just say me & my fav. girl Isabel/tori had a connection. It was magical. I still think about it today & it is eerie. So, anyhow, rush over to Lisa & we walk in. Sat like 5th row I guess! They were good seats to me. Sat in front of Lisa & Nina. This is when I met my new friend Max. The guy seating right next to me. My seat mate. :o) I asked him where he was from & he said Silverlake! I said 'oh really, I use to live in Los Feliz for years' (that's right next door). We got on really fast & well. We exchanged numbers and I kept running into him every show after. Hi Max! Ok, so this show was the best out of the 3 Oakland shows because she did a lot of my requests. I don't ask her straight foward (ok, maybe 'Parasol' I did) but in letter form, but not how you're thinking. And she did them in one night, so I was happy.
The show- 3rd Oakland show & the best out of the 3. First time for me seeing Clyde, so this night marks the point where I've seen all 5 dolls. The same 'ole songs & by now I am getting tired of hearing them over & over again. I was sitting around friends & had a pretty good seat. Then she started w/ all the songs I requested, which were: 'A sorta fairytale', 'The power of orange knickers' (one of my very most fav. songs I've never seen Tori do-I missed The Beekeeper tour (except for The Greek show), so I was playing catch up), 'Siren' and 'The Beekeeper' (for my G'pa and for me) so that was 4 songs in one night! Fucking hot! I was so pleased. She already did my 'CALS' the first Oakland show & my 'Beulah Land' my first show in Oregon. Now my 'Parasol' awaits me. It was really nice to hear one of my very fav. ever out of Tori's catolog of songs: 'Baker Baker'. This song will always take me back to the time, the moment I first heard this delicate, yet powerful song. Sheeeew, did she ever change my life. 'I know you're late for your next parade, you CAME to MAKE SURE that I'm not RUNNING'... and 'maybe not this time'... and the few piano notes right after that line, my god was I crying. Thank you tori for writing such a song/this and 'Pretty Good year' are sibblings, I know they are, that or soulmates. 'Rattlesnakes', 'Josephine' and 'Bliss' were really lovely to hear. Pretty damn, good show, but she was really tired and WAS IT SHOWING! Hope this DVD is worth all the time she spent making it, promoting it, perfecting it and allowing it to take up all her time and energy. Ooh and watching it in Arizona while we were all outside in the rain waiting for her. Whateves! Before the show I got to spend some time w/ my babies Kate & Chris. Love them to death. We must go to the beach again and get a new kite to fly! That other one was a cheap piece of gas station shit. Haha. I still have my Seahorse & turtle mood rings. I think of you everytime I wear them. :o) so after the show I hug all my friends goodbye! Sniff sniff. So don't remember much what we did after this. Were gonna eat @ a resturant w/ bunch of people but we all ended up back @ that fucking taco bell, lord help us! So...oh yeah, haha-we went thru the drive-thru & then parked next to lisa & shelia when this guy comes up & starts soluting us and calling himself commander. He did some gnarly push-ups as he counted off. Got some change from us, soluted us, then off he went. Haha. Wow. Jim, lisa & I left to go back to Jim's house. Lastnight there & I will miss his dad, mom, dog and house. Can I have your dog jim? Peeeaazzz? Come on!

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